Iran

How strange to hear Iran pronounced correctly on the news. The whole topic of Iran is hard for me to discuss right now. I'm visiting my parents, and it's a constant topic of conversation and CNN is always on - surprising that they're covering primarily Iran! Perhaps we'll get credit for being something other than terrorists. Clearly, random thoughts come to mind first. The rest of my thoughts are mostly images: tear gas, Neda, protests I've seen here in Toronto and on t.v., and the Basiji.

I'm happy that the people are starting to go against the regime and are leaving the silly choice between Ahmadinejad and Mousavi behind them. What's the point of an election when the "supreme leader" says who gets to run? The greatest question is what does all this mean? What does the future hold?

The hardest emotion for me to deal with is the guilt. I hope to benefit from this struggle - to travel to a free Iran, to take my son and discover with him the glory of the Persians, to take my mom to her birth country (as she'll only go when the regime changes), and to finally see what much of my life has revolved around. From a comfortable chair and with many freedoms, I watch our people fight and I wish them great success. All I can do is help spread their message, keep them in my thoughts, and partake in protests over here. I struggle with my acknowledgment that I don't plan on boarding a plane and joining the fight. I am weak and selfish, I suppose.

Good luck. You deserve much more than what you have. I hope your suffering ends soon and that this horrific regime will be held accountable for their actions.

Preschool?!?!

I can't believe I'm already supposed to be thinking about preschool. In fact, some would say that I am behind the times and should have had Kian enrolled somewhere once I knew I was pregnant. Oh well. I wrote my first preschool today to see what their deal is... I think it's our preferred program based on the one article I have read. haha!

While I'm feeling behind in that department, at least I have other realms where I am growing more confident: feeding Kian solid foods, found some awesome thin cotton, muslin swaddling blankets, have created some great teething snacks for Kian, and I'm pretty comfy getting around these days. If only Kian would sleep through the night... I wouldn't mind a little more sleep!

Animals

Sometimes I am reminded of how much I care about animals and keep up with what is going on with them... and then I think back to my days (from childhood) when I entertained becoming a wildlife biologist. I still entertain this dream at times, only it's so incompatible with the other things I want in life -- like the family life I have set up with Kian and Rob. Ah, the wonderful world of decisions.

Example of something that really excites me and that most people don't care about: Farmers, Warriors, Builders: The Hidden Life of Ants. E.O. Wilson is my hero.

Guilt

Some days leave me feeling guiltier than others and today is one of them. I hate that. I know I carry more guilt than is necessary - worry that I hurt a friend's feelings, that I was misunderstood, that Rob washed too many dishes, that I didn't play with Kian enough, etc. etc. Today is one of those days. I hate this feeling. I wish there were a magic no-guilt potion, but then I can't imagine how much more messed up this world would be.

Alone Time

I've never been a fan of alone time. However, I'm really hating alone time when Rob is not here during the week once Kian goes to sleep. I can't leave the house, so I start feeling like a hostage in my own home. Kian is worth it, of course, but it's a weird sentiment I wasn't expecting. When Kian is awake, I'm fine. It's at night where I start feeling feisty. :)

First Family Dish

Kian had his first meal that we also ate! I made some alterations, but it was primarily the same. What a yummy dish!

I love this food blog. On Sunday, I'm going to a friend's house, as he's hosting a pot luck with a Smitten Kitchen theme. I need to go through and pick out things I want to make for that night and pick one. SO hard to choose one, but I'm looking forward to the process.